Rambunctious Re-Ignition
Here I am, back again.
As it has been a while since I last posted you will have to excuse my over-exuberant lexical indulgence. It has been a great length of time since this fine sesquipedalian immersed himself in the vast and tranquil pool of big words.
A little story, just indulge me…
I started awake, it was about 5:30 in the afternoon and Mary still wasn’t home. This wasn’t all that unusual, sometimes she had to stay a bit late, the bills won’t pay themselves you see. I don’t mind too much, the days can seem a bit long but I can always watch TV and nap. You know, I was quite hungry, it was a while since Lilly brought me lunch and helped me to the loo. I reached to the side of my chair where Mary had left me a box of crisps. God I love her.
Anyway, I was watching bargain hunt when Lilly brought me my lunch, beans on toast. Simple. Like myself. It reminds me of way back, simpler times. She is lovely to me that Lilly, I always wish she could stay longer, she says she wishes she could as well but I reckon she says that to all of us. Where is Mary? The house feels so empty these days, its really nice to have a little visit every day, to break the gloomy spell of the empty house.
As I shovelled salty crisps into my mouth my mind drifted back, to before. Before the tartan blanket and day-time telly. When my best friend still lived, the faithful hound. I had to give him up, how could I care for an animal when I can’t even care for myself? Mary cared for him before she had to go back to work. Where has she got too? I hate it all. Crisps spill down my front.
How did I become so useless? Age? Fate? God? Only a fool would claim they know. I but the TV back on. It’s the news at 6.
Christmas with the family, I can remember it. Not what I got or who from. Mary sorts out what I get other people. She is a wonderful wife. The only gift I got myself, well got Lilly to get in secret. A blue cashmere cardigan, she loved it. It was such a lovely surprise for her. It made the journey north to join the Christmas worth it. Piling into our shitty green Peugeot. Presents in the back, blankets on me. What a journey, I was so stiff from sitting I could barley move. Ha, not that I really can anyway.
A female voice cuts my thoughts, “Troops are gradually being…”. Just the news, my mind drifts. I have a crisp. Mary will kill me for snacking this close to dinner. I hope she’s not lost. I feel guilty at that and resolve to eat all of whatever Mary cooks, I owe her that. “Live from the incident…”. I pick up the remote to switch the channel, there is too much suffering to know about it all. I have a crisp.
I pause. Finger on the remote, local news always pulls me in. But it was the African reporter fellow, can’t understand a word he says. A flash of green. I see a rolled green Peugeot on the hard shoulder. “Fell asleep at the wheel.” Cut to an ambulance, “It was all too late”… Do I know that car? The zip of a body bag, red soaked blue. That’s Mary’s car. I choke.
Alan Bennett would be proud.
